Dbee Robinson Artist - The Fat Struggling Menopausal Artist

  Where My Heart Used to Be They say grief comes in waves, but no one tells you the size, how a calm sea can suddenly rise and darken the skies. They say grief comes in waves, crashing into you like a tsunami tide, dragging away everything you knew, everything safe, everything that survived. One moment I'm standing, holding myself together somehow, the next I'm drowning in memories, asking, "What do I do now?" Each wave finds me unexpectedly— while making tea, while folding clothes, while passing a place we used to go. And yes, you can brush your teeth whilst sobbing. You can answer questions whilst breaking. You can smile at the world while your soul is quietly shaking. It's exhausting. Deep-down, bone-aching, spirit-breaking exhausting. The kind that sleep cannot cure, because sleep itself has become a thief; bringing me dreams of my David, then waking me back to grief. Every part of me is yearning for him. Every heartbeat calls his name. Every sunrise feels the...

  It’s been a rollercoaster of emotions since November last year, and January was just hell. I am pretty much broken and feel I’m in a constant state of panic. However, every day I try to find a little bit of joy to help me through the week.  A coffee in a cafe, the sun on my face, cooking a delicious lunch, finding that perfect jacket when shopping with my Brother, seeing a friend, messages from my grandchildren, time in the garden, my lovely neighbour Mary popping round, listening to the early morning bird song, etc.  My American Sister is texting me hugs every day, and knowing my dearest friend, Barbra and her husband Gary, are there for me feels like a joyful safety net of love. My dear friend Richard in Mauritius messages every day, and I awake to a hello every morning, it is such a joy too.  Friday was pottery evening with my darling daughter Lisa, and although I really didn’t want to go out, time with her is always precious; she is always a joy to be around an...

The Yin to my Yang? Do you have a soul mate? What is a soul mate anyway? I'm married to a great guy but he's not my soul mate, I'm not sure I even know what one is. If you know then please do enlighten me by simply commenting below. He's not even my best friend, that job goes to another soul who knows and understands me better than I do. He's not perfect and he doesn't complete me as i'm not an incomplete person. He sometimes infuriates me (and I him) and sometimes we even have to leave the room to hold our tongues, but that's so rare it's a shock when we feel that way.  What I am sure of though, is he's a good man with good morals and a kind heart. He makes me laugh, supports my dreams and does his best, and I try to do the same for him. There are a lot more positive thoughts I could add but i'm sure you get my drift? Occasionally he makes great choices and decisions.... e.g. - When he said "I DO" all those years a...